Stop Overcomplicating Things

Life is as simple or as complicated as you make it out to be.

Life is not easy, but it definitely does not have to be as challenging as we make it. Relationships, careers, guilt, expectations, self-worth – so many factors can influence the way we perceive the world and the way we perceive our lives.

It is so easy to get caught up in all the drama, gossip, and assumptions we make about each other. It is so easy to convince ourselves that our life circumstances are not our fault. It is so easy to blame other people, especially the ones closest to us, for all our misfortune and limitations.

There is always an excuse.

Though this blame game is an easier option in the short-term, it really overcomplicates life in the long-term. The effects of playing the victim of our lives over a number of years eventually becomes difficult to manage and seemingly impossible to escape.

Think of a time when you blamed someone for something. It does not have to be a big event. It can be as simple as someone driving under the speed limit on the highway; a grocery store lane with the light flashing because some person grabbed a box with no price tag on it; a spouse who takes too long in the shower causing you to run late for work. It can be the rain, the snow, the wind, the traffic, the long lines at the store, other people’s parking jobs, and so on. There has to be something you blamed someone else for in the recent past.

What emotions do remember feeling during that time? Likely anger, frustration, lots of tension, maybe resentment, and a sense of entitlement. You probably uttered the phrase, “If that person did/did not do that, everything would be fine. That person is an inconsiderate idiot <or insert preferred derogatory phrase here>.” We have all done it. We have all thought this at one point or another.

But why? Why do we react like that? Why do we immediately assume that whatever occurred is someone else’s fault? Why do we even associate fault at all? Why not lean toward an attitude of acceptance and then use our brains to problem solve? It is far more efficient and so much less stressful to resist jumping to conclusions and think through the logical reasons why things are not going your way, rather than blame the nearest person.


Try this during your next commute to work: When someone cuts you off or does not let you merge onto the highway, before cursing at them, consider how important it is to get angry at the situation and whether the moment will pass quickly. Decide not to get angry and just plan your driving strategy in response to the changes you see around you. Chances are that the event will last five seconds or less and by the time you get to work you will not remember that it happened. In such a case, you are not letting external things impact your day. You can walk into work with one less complaint and be a more positive presence to those around you. Keep making small improvements like this and you will find yourself to be a much happier, simpler person.

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